🏠 Go home.

Shock and Awe

Published on

So i've not blagged since SELF, for a lot of reasons; work has been busy, ive been spending more time at HeatSync Labs, and ive been going through a hit of a rough patch.

I dropped my class schedule for asu because I felt like I could make it for a year in the real world, long enough to save up enough money and go back to school at some place else, probably UAT. Well, it turns out that is not the case, I'm probably going to be going to class in a few weeks, whether I want to or not. I hope uat can still get me enrolled, otherwise, I'll spend another year hating asu.

Caity and I fell apart, and I'm afraid shes never going to talk to me again. It turns out I'm not as mature as I had thought, and I drove her away because of that. I hadnt even seen it coming until the day she told me the day she had got an apartment and told me she didnt want to be with me any more. Ive spent the last two weeks acting like a child, avoiding my parents, and making caity miserable. I didnt know I could act this way, its kind of horrible. I think I'm finally clear of that though, and maybe its not too late to save our friendship.

Last week I got to escape he real world for a while by going to santa cruz for my team's semiannual planning meeting. Santa cruz is a beautiful place, but its definitely a burner town, lol. It was a bittersweet meeting, since it was the first meeting after Max left, but I feel like it went well, except for me being bloody stressed ans upset.

Respond to this note:

Ryan Rix is a computer infrastructure fanboy who dabbles in decentralized systems. Reach him on twitter as @rrrrrrrix, via email to ryan@whatthefuck.computer or on Facebook or on Matrix as @rrix:kickass.systems.